This Unicorn Changed the Way I Poop – #SquattyPotty

This Unicorn Changed the Way I Poop – #SquattyPotty


This is where your ice cream comes from–
the creamy poop of a mystic unicorn. Totally clean, totally cool, and soft-served straight
from a sphincter. Mmm. They’re good at pooping. But you know
who sucks at pooping? You do. That’s ’cause when you sit on the porcelain
throne, this muscle put a kink in the hose and stops the Ben & Jerry’s from sliding
out smoothly. Is that a problem? I don’t know, are hemorrhoids
a problem? ‘Cause sitting at this angle can cause hemorrhoids, bloating, constipation,
and a buttload of other crap. And seriously, unicorn hemorrhoids? – The
glitter gets everywhere. But what happens when you go from a sit to
a squat? Voila– the muscle relaxes and that kink goes
away faster than Pegasus laying a sweet sherbet dookie. Now your colon’s open and ready
for battle. That’s ’cause our bodies were made to poop
in a squat. And now there’s a product that lets you squat in your own home. Introducing the Squatty Potty. No, it’s not a joke. And yes, it will give
you the best poop of your life, guaranteed. I don’t just mean you bloated lords and
hemorrhoidal ladies — I mean everyone. Kink Unkink. Kink, unkink. It’s simple science
really. Can’t get the last scoop out of the carton? With the Squatty Potty you get complete elimination. Spend too much time on the chamber pot? Squatty Potty makes you go twice as fast,
or your money back. I scream, you scream, and plop plop, baby. Maybe you’re sore from squeezing out solid
globs of rocky road. The Squatty Potty gives you a smooth stream
of froyo that glides like a virgin swan. Plus when you’re done, it tucks neatly out
of sight, thanks to its innovative patented design. Truly a footstool fit for a constipated
king! So if you’re a human being who poops from
your butt, click here to order your Squatty Potty today at SquattyPotty.com. You’ll wish
you tried it years ago. And if you don’t trust a prince, how about
your Doctor? Shark Tank? HuffPost? NPR? Men’s Health? Howard Stern?–He poops from his butt. They’re all crazy about the Squatty Potty.
Not to mention the 2,000 Amazon users who gave the Squatty Potty 5 stars, including
the author of this moving haiku: “Oh Squatty Potty You fill me with endless joy Yet leave me empty.” So order your Squatty Potty today. I’m not
saying it will make your poop as soft as this cookies’n’cream. But I’m not saying it won’t. Squatty Potty. The stool for better stools. Pooping will never be the same… And neither will ice cream. One for you, very good.
How does it taste is that delicious? Is that the best thing you have ever had in
your life? There you are .

100 comments

  1. "is that a problem? I don't know, is hemorrhoids a problem?"
    idk why but just the way he says this line cracks me up lol XD

  2. This commercial is absolute gold lol. I’m fine without the Squatty potty though, I just hit the low squat right over the toilet bowl and take care of business with controlled breathing. Then sit down to chill for a couple of minutes lol

  3. Someone commented on this rudely and I didn't have time to reply to it because I reported it.
    If I had replied, I would have said something like 🙈, 🙉, 🙊, or…
    Nice try! I'm keeping it a secret.

  4. Squirty Turdy,,
    3 to 5 inchs of elevation for explosive diarrhea.
    And a detachable mud flap to protect the back of the bowl.
    That unicorn is goong to make some kids want to eat dooh dooh.😛

  5. I swear, this is the same advertising firm that did the Purple Mattress cover sheet Sasquatches. Both are hilariously whacked.

  6. Last I checked I`m not a Unicorn, never met or even seen a real life Unicorn, but more important,,
    I am 100% positive I do not have a red rubbery wishbone in my Ass!01:16

  7. What I want to know is how the hell did he do this commercial with a straight face without laughing or giggling????

  8. Squatty potty Omg i need this so bad 👍👍👍when i cant get it i feel like my ass hole is rip💀 XD

  9. I've been the on-call dogsitter for one of my dad's friends for about six months. It wasn't until recently that I realized that the stool tucked beneath the toilet looked a lot like a squatty potty, so I decided to actually look at it. Turns out that it is in fact a squatty potty, so I tried it out. I feel awkward saying this, but it's actually not bad and definitely helps take some of the strain out of pooping. Not everyone will find it useful, but that's the case with everything

  10. If you need so inspirational while you are on the throne stop by my channel. I can't promise I will be as effective as the squatty potty, but I can't promise I won't either haha👍

  11. Thank you, I've been having a horrid time getting my child to have a bowel movement. She held it in for too long and then it hurt her so she refused to poop at all until her body would force it, which hurt, starting the cycle over again. I kept trying to explain why she needed to poop and how to sit so it wouldn't hurt as much but couldn't find anything for visuals, just me telling facts. But then I remembered this ad and how it shows the muscles relaxing and it frickin worked!!! She thought the unicorn was hilarious and she copied it and finally had a bowel movement without crying, she actually laughed instead and said she'd go poop again tomorrow if she could watch the unicorn again while doing it. I know it might not seem like a big thing to some people but your child being in pain going to the washroom is so agonizing. So thank you for your informative, funny video that has helped so much.

  12. My tech teacher showed us this as an example of good marketing (one of the projects we can choose is to make and edit a fake ad for a product)

  13. Clearly the most 'tasteful', so to speak, commercial ever 'produced', or should I say, excreted. Doubt very much though, it will ever be shown next to the 700 Club or around Fox commentaries amongst other programs.

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